Many people sell their belongings and move to another city or country in search of true meaning of life. It can be challenging as you can imagine. It is never easy moving to a new place and expecting to settle in straightaway.
I knew Melbourne was going to be different to Adelaide. I did underestimate my ability to settle in to a backpackers’ lifestyle. I have always been living in a house either by myself or shared it with another being. So having to sleep in a room of 6 people and sharing toilets and laundry with numerous others wasn’t easy.
On many occasions I wanted to take my car and drive back to Adelaide. But I didn’t. My friends like Seema, Karina and Sharon kept telling me that I will find my feet soon. And on the other hand, friends like Molly and Minzy had their hearts and homes open for me if I ever decided to go back. My friends have been a massive source of inspiration to me when I felt like giving up. The feeling of wanting to go back because “I am feeling lost”, happened during the first few days after moving to Melbourne. I know right! Talk about being patient. Well, that was never one of my virtues I must say.
On the third day, I got into the rhythm of things and just moved along. I was able to find that space to meditate again. Once I was able to do that, I felt like I was at home. Finding that inner stillness was the key to knowing I am still connected to this vast source of intelligence which is omnipresent and that I can never be lost.
I remember the first time I did the inner body meditation by Eckhart Tolle. Going deep into the body and listening to my heart beat and the blood flow made me realize how much goes on inside our body that is subtle and often not paid attention to. When I looked at the plants in the garden, I noticed how still they are and yet they are absorbing the sunlight, producing food, transporting food and water and giving out oxygen. I felt immense love emanating from my body to my surrounding upon the realization that we are all one.
Here’s a link to the inner body meditation on Youtube: Inner Body Meditation – Eckhart Tolle (Guided by Kim Eng)
There is the same intelligence that we have in our body which is present in plants, birds and throughout the whole Universe. The planets oscillate in a certain direction but never seem to collide with one another. Ever wondered how that is possible? I know scientists would have a name for it but that’s just man-made and not the reality.
When I say ‘man-made’ I mean we call them plants. It is just a word which we use to describe them. In reality they did not introduce themselves as ‘plants’ to us. It is a name given to them by humans. Likewise if I had to describe this sensation of the inner body, I would use words like intelligence, life force or energy. Please remember these are just words and not the reality. I had to put in perspective for the readers but you will understand what I mean once you have experienced it. That you can never describe it and be right.
I sensed that the intelligence or the life force or energy, which is in me is also present outside of me. So I am not just within this body. I am the energy that is present throughout this entire Universe. The energy that is contained within this body is to experience life in a different form. As Pierre Teilhard de Chardin said, “I am a spirit having a human experience”.
After finding that space to meditate on my bed in the dorm, the feeling of being lost disappeared. And meditation has become my food. I feel starved if I do not meditate everyday. Once upon time meditating everyday was a tedious task because there is so much going in our daily lives and it is so hard to sit in one place. Now that doesn’t seem so difficult anymore.
The feeling of being lost, uncertainty or even fear are some of the emotions that you might experience when you are on a spiritual journey. Meditating brings everything back to stillness. In that stillness we realize how we and the other beings are one and not separate. May love and light be with you xx.